Stuff You Can't Make Up #153987 So I thought I'd finally interrupt my brief hiatus to bring you some important news...!

ITEM #1
TRAMPOLINE CAUSES FREEWAY CRASH

"A FLYING trampoline has caused a crash between a car and a truck on a freeway in Melbourne's southeast.

Paramedics say the trampoline blew off the roof of a car transporting it along the Princes Freeway at Narre Warren shortly after 8pm (AEDT) yesterday.

The trampoline then flew into the windscreen of the car behind.

That car was then struck from behind by a semi-trailer.

Ambulance Victoria advanced life support paramedic Jamie Watkinson said a 29-year-old man suffered swelling, a cut on the forehead and pain in his eyes and chest from the collision.

He was taken to the Dandenong Hospital in a stable condition.

A 22-year-old woman from the same car suffered minor injuries and was also taken to Dandenong Hospital in a stable condition.

The truck driver was not injured. "

ITEM #2
MAN KILLED IN DRUNK GAME OF CHESS!

"According to police, the two men were drinking and playing chess when they began fighting. Christian apparently killed Steward by putting Steward's neck between Christian's legs and squeezing until Steward died, according to police.

Christian also received a fine of $1,000, which was suspended, and was ordered to pay $150,000 to Steward's estate or heirs.

"I am sick of myself and I am sorry I have caused so much hurt of those who loved Mike," Christian said. "I will carry my shame ... for my remaining days.""

I'm glad that Steward shows remorse for his actions. But did he ever think about the embarassment that Christian now has to carry into his after-life for having been killed in one of the slowest, most non-violent activities in the world? No, sir.
  ¶ posted by Jon at 10/13/2009